Seeing Shades of Green
So it’s been a busy couple of weeks. I feel like I’m falling back into the working schedule as well as the gym schedule, Bible study schedule, and various other schedules for groups I’m involved in. Lately I’ve been very tired and worn out and…well, blah. I actually didn’t go to the gym today because I feel like I just need a break. At some point in the future, I think I might have to start pulling on the reigns and quit signing up for things.
Last Saturday Ryan and I traveled to AL (or LA) to attend my grandmother’s side’s family reunion. I know that for most people a family reunion seems like the most boring thing to do on a beautiful Saturday or possibly just another event to hear “I used to change your diapers!” or “Have you been eating fertilizer?” and my favorite, “The last time I saw you…!”. However, this was not the case on Saturday. We went, visited, ate, told stories about relatives already gone, visited some more, and finally headed home. This was the first family reunion since I was a baby (and the first I’ve ever attended that I remember) and I can honestly say that I enjoyed it so much. And yes, there were tons of people that I didn’t really know, but there were others that I did know and was delighted to get to see and visit with.
As many of the family members all live on the same road (and some across the street from each other) this was always a place of refuge for me when I was growing up. Because I didn’t have the “normal” family (and honestly, who does?) my mother and I would travel to Dothan every now and then and I found that it was some sort of escape for me. When I was up there, I could forget the dysfunctional-ness with my own family (one parental unit in particular) and I’d play pretend in my mind that I lived up there and everything was fine and perfect and all was right in the world. I’m now older (much older…and feeling it everyday) and I realize that if I had lived up there things wouldn’t have been perfect. Those family members did have problems and struggles. They may not have had the same problems I did, but they still had problems and they still had things come up that made parts of life rough. And even though I wanted to live up there SO BAD and would have sold a kidney to be part of their “perfect family” it would never have happened. Because even if we HAD lived up there, I still wouldn’t have had the perfect family, life, or whatever else I’m forgetting to include. I’ve learned that NO ONE’S life is perfect or even “easy”.
Anyway, Saturday I realized that this is something I’ve learned and have come to understand and accept…and welcome. I know that my life will never be “perfect” and I’m okay with that…because no one else’s is, either…nor is it supposed to be. When my troubles come (because I know that they will), I know that everyone has troubles and not everyone’s are the same, but everyone has them nonetheless. The grass isn’t greener; it’s just a different shade of green.
And in a weird way, that’s kind of comforting.
Last Saturday Ryan and I traveled to AL (or LA) to attend my grandmother’s side’s family reunion. I know that for most people a family reunion seems like the most boring thing to do on a beautiful Saturday or possibly just another event to hear “I used to change your diapers!” or “Have you been eating fertilizer?” and my favorite, “The last time I saw you…!”. However, this was not the case on Saturday. We went, visited, ate, told stories about relatives already gone, visited some more, and finally headed home. This was the first family reunion since I was a baby (and the first I’ve ever attended that I remember) and I can honestly say that I enjoyed it so much. And yes, there were tons of people that I didn’t really know, but there were others that I did know and was delighted to get to see and visit with.
As many of the family members all live on the same road (and some across the street from each other) this was always a place of refuge for me when I was growing up. Because I didn’t have the “normal” family (and honestly, who does?) my mother and I would travel to Dothan every now and then and I found that it was some sort of escape for me. When I was up there, I could forget the dysfunctional-ness with my own family (one parental unit in particular) and I’d play pretend in my mind that I lived up there and everything was fine and perfect and all was right in the world. I’m now older (much older…and feeling it everyday) and I realize that if I had lived up there things wouldn’t have been perfect. Those family members did have problems and struggles. They may not have had the same problems I did, but they still had problems and they still had things come up that made parts of life rough. And even though I wanted to live up there SO BAD and would have sold a kidney to be part of their “perfect family” it would never have happened. Because even if we HAD lived up there, I still wouldn’t have had the perfect family, life, or whatever else I’m forgetting to include. I’ve learned that NO ONE’S life is perfect or even “easy”.
Anyway, Saturday I realized that this is something I’ve learned and have come to understand and accept…and welcome. I know that my life will never be “perfect” and I’m okay with that…because no one else’s is, either…nor is it supposed to be. When my troubles come (because I know that they will), I know that everyone has troubles and not everyone’s are the same, but everyone has them nonetheless. The grass isn’t greener; it’s just a different shade of green.
And in a weird way, that’s kind of comforting.
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