I Swore I'd Never Do It
So…I’ve been sick for a week now. Last Monday I woke up with the “throat junk”, went in, got an antibiotic and a shot (in the booty), and went home to sleep. I started feeling better by Tuesday, but by Wednesday and Thursday I was actually starting to feel worse. Friday and Saturday I felt like death. I even yelled at Ryan Saturday for asking me if I was going to take a second nap (Hello! I’m sick!) He got over it (and I took another nap).
Sunday he had to play at church and I was planning on attending the 11:00 service. I got up, showered, dressed, and took care of the dogs. As I kept wandering around the house, I started feeling worse and worse. I was SO sleepy and congested and all of the above. I just felt terrible. So I did what I should have done; I got a pillow and a quilt, got the dogs situated on the couch with me (we kept Phoebe for the weekend while the ‘rents went on a vacation), and…took another nap. Slept for two hours. I woke up just in time to get the bedspread lines off my face before Ryan got back home. :-)
Once he got home, I decided that I was going to have a “real meal” for lunch/dinner (if you’re southern you know it’s dinner…lunch is what you have at school or work, dinner is the feast you serve AT the table (not from the stove)…I have to use lunch just so people know what I’m talking about). I realized that I hadn’t cooked a real meal all week with me being sick and all. Even though I wasn’t well yet, I wanted something other than a burger and fries. Luckily, I had some “help” stockpiled in the freezer. And here’s where my blog post’s plotline forms.
I grew up with the mom that I saw as perfect. She was up before me (and sometimes the sun) getting breakfast ready, served very good, balanced meals (we hardly ever ate out), the house was usually pretty tidy (lived in, but tidy), bathrooms were clean, kitchen seldom had dishes in the sink overnight, and that breakfast I was talking about?...yeah, it wasn’t cereal or pop tarts. Oh no. Every morning, and I mean EVERY MORNING, I was sent off to school with pancakes, eggs, sausage, bacon, French toast, and homemade waffles swelling in my stomach. She was awesome. I never thought about it much back then, but looking back, holy cow, how’d she do it?!
I really starting thinking about this soon after Ryan and I married. Even though we don’t have children yet, I’m still a wife and I think I have some of that “1950s mentality” regarding the stereotypical wife...the one that prepares supper and vacuums in pearls and heels. When we’d come home from work and I’d throw a Tombstone in the oven, inside I hated myself for not planning ahead or having the endurance or energy to actually cook a meal. I actually remember thinking, “Why aren’t I good enough at this? What am I doing wrong? Why can’t I get it together? I thought I’d be a better wife than this…”
This month is our third anniversary. Although I still struggle with this somewhat, I have come so far. I certainly think it’s a little healthy to set some standards for myself so that I don’t become a lazy slug, but the bar has definitely been lowered to a more reachable height. Take for instance this past Sunday. Ryan came home to a wonderful smelling house. I had one of those frozen “Skillet Meals” by Stouffer’s on the stove (open a bag, pour it in a skillet, heat…seriously, that’s it). Ryan started another saucepan for some instant mashed potatoes, and in 10 minutes, Voila! We had a meal! Get this…I LOVE sweet tea on a Sunday. I also love tea when it’s brewed in the morning and then mixed up right before dinner/lunch. Obviously, I forgot to make it that morning, so I pulled down a jar of instant tea and mixed that up. As we sat down at the table, I couldn’t help but laugh at our “instant” meal. Ryan took a sip of the tea and pulled back a bitter face. He asked, “Did you put sugar in the tea?” Oops. I reached behind me for the container of sweetener packets, threw him a pink, and took one for myself. Flawless.
See…three years ago I NEVER would have seen me doing that. I would have cooked the post roast with veggies from scratch, boiled, peeled, and mashed the potatoes the real way, and made the tea that morning before leaving for church. (I would also have MADE myself attend church, even if I were sick as a dog.) I would have done all these things because that’s what I’d seen my mother do for so many years. Not long ago I was talking to my mom about this area of interest and I asked her why and how she did it so well. She told me that she figured it was her job and she just had to. She also said that she didn’t have time for the other stuff or even herself…time in the hammock, walking the dog, a movie with the hubby, none of that.
As I start another week, I am amazed at another one of my realizations. I’ve realized that I’m not Betty Crocker, I don’t have the magazine home, I don’t do everything perfect, nor do I cook the three course meal each time we sit down. And that’s totally okay. It's not needed. I love my husband and my family, I enjoy our time together, and I’m happier now than I’ve ever been. I enjoy fixing meals, but that's certainly not numero uno on my priority list. Having the super clean house isn't as important as me being fully rested or us having our "down time". Before I got married there were certain things that I totally looked down on...not only am I retracting those statements, I'm purchasing those items (and sometimes in bulk!). I once swore that I’d NEVER cook instant potatoes. I now stand corrected and am looking from a whole different view. If fixing instant potatoes allows me to score a few extra minutes in the hammock to enjoy the outside, I’ll do it…and I’ll enjoy every sticky bite.
Sunday he had to play at church and I was planning on attending the 11:00 service. I got up, showered, dressed, and took care of the dogs. As I kept wandering around the house, I started feeling worse and worse. I was SO sleepy and congested and all of the above. I just felt terrible. So I did what I should have done; I got a pillow and a quilt, got the dogs situated on the couch with me (we kept Phoebe for the weekend while the ‘rents went on a vacation), and…took another nap. Slept for two hours. I woke up just in time to get the bedspread lines off my face before Ryan got back home. :-)
Once he got home, I decided that I was going to have a “real meal” for lunch/dinner (if you’re southern you know it’s dinner…lunch is what you have at school or work, dinner is the feast you serve AT the table (not from the stove)…I have to use lunch just so people know what I’m talking about). I realized that I hadn’t cooked a real meal all week with me being sick and all. Even though I wasn’t well yet, I wanted something other than a burger and fries. Luckily, I had some “help” stockpiled in the freezer. And here’s where my blog post’s plotline forms.I grew up with the mom that I saw as perfect. She was up before me (and sometimes the sun) getting breakfast ready, served very good, balanced meals (we hardly ever ate out), the house was usually pretty tidy (lived in, but tidy), bathrooms were clean, kitchen seldom had dishes in the sink overnight, and that breakfast I was talking about?...yeah, it wasn’t cereal or pop tarts. Oh no. Every morning, and I mean EVERY MORNING, I was sent off to school with pancakes, eggs, sausage, bacon, French toast, and homemade waffles swelling in my stomach. She was awesome. I never thought about it much back then, but looking back, holy cow, how’d she do it?!
I really starting thinking about this soon after Ryan and I married. Even though we don’t have children yet, I’m still a wife and I think I have some of that “1950s mentality” regarding the stereotypical wife...the one that prepares supper and vacuums in pearls and heels. When we’d come home from work and I’d throw a Tombstone in the oven, inside I hated myself for not planning ahead or having the endurance or energy to actually cook a meal. I actually remember thinking, “Why aren’t I good enough at this? What am I doing wrong? Why can’t I get it together? I thought I’d be a better wife than this…”This month is our third anniversary. Although I still struggle with this somewhat, I have come so far. I certainly think it’s a little healthy to set some standards for myself so that I don’t become a lazy slug, but the bar has definitely been lowered to a more reachable height. Take for instance this past Sunday. Ryan came home to a wonderful smelling house. I had one of those frozen “Skillet Meals” by Stouffer’s on the stove (open a bag, pour it in a skillet, heat…seriously, that’s it). Ryan started another saucepan for some instant mashed potatoes, and in 10 minutes, Voila! We had a meal! Get this…I LOVE sweet tea on a Sunday. I also love tea when it’s brewed in the morning and then mixed up right before dinner/lunch. Obviously, I forgot to make it that morning, so I pulled down a jar of instant tea and mixed that up. As we sat down at the table, I couldn’t help but laugh at our “instant” meal. Ryan took a sip of the tea and pulled back a bitter face. He asked, “Did you put sugar in the tea?” Oops. I reached behind me for the container of sweetener packets, threw him a pink, and took one for myself. Flawless.
See…three years ago I NEVER would have seen me doing that. I would have cooked the post roast with veggies from scratch, boiled, peeled, and mashed the potatoes the real way, and made the tea that morning before leaving for church. (I would also have MADE myself attend church, even if I were sick as a dog.) I would have done all these things because that’s what I’d seen my mother do for so many years. Not long ago I was talking to my mom about this area of interest and I asked her why and how she did it so well. She told me that she figured it was her job and she just had to. She also said that she didn’t have time for the other stuff or even herself…time in the hammock, walking the dog, a movie with the hubby, none of that.
As I start another week, I am amazed at another one of my realizations. I’ve realized that I’m not Betty Crocker, I don’t have the magazine home, I don’t do everything perfect, nor do I cook the three course meal each time we sit down. And that’s totally okay. It's not needed. I love my husband and my family, I enjoy our time together, and I’m happier now than I’ve ever been. I enjoy fixing meals, but that's certainly not numero uno on my priority list. Having the super clean house isn't as important as me being fully rested or us having our "down time". Before I got married there were certain things that I totally looked down on...not only am I retracting those statements, I'm purchasing those items (and sometimes in bulk!). I once swore that I’d NEVER cook instant potatoes. I now stand corrected and am looking from a whole different view. If fixing instant potatoes allows me to score a few extra minutes in the hammock to enjoy the outside, I’ll do it…and I’ll enjoy every sticky bite.
This week I encourage you to prepare a Stouffer's Easy Skillet Meal (on sale at Publix through Tuesday!), relax afterward while you sip on your very own instant tea...and just for kicks, go ahead and wear the pearls and heels...that way we at least get half the credit. :-)
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