Sometimes You Just Gotta Laugh
This has truly been a Monday. And not only has it been one heck of a day, it also started EARLY.
Let's see, where should we start? Ryan bought us a new baby gate. The one we had was the wooden kind that holds itself with tension. We got the new one during the week, but lacked time to install it. It's the one that is metal and screws into the wall. Remember that...ATTACHES to the wall. We decided to put it between the living room and eating area. After Ryan installed it, we were a little concerned that it would stay in place if Lane pulled himself up on it. Sigh...yeah...
Lane has been a bit of a turd lately and has started a new habit of waking up at 3:00 am. This morning was no exception. At 3:16 this morning I finally got up to get him a bottle of water. I got up, walked to the kitchen (you SO know where I'm going with this, right?) and...let's just say the only thing I remember is thinking, "What the...? Why am I parallel to the floor...but not hitting it...but certainly not standing up? And why does my mid section feel like someone took a crow bar to it?" Yeah...we'd left the swinging gate open so we could get through it easier in the middle of the night. Would have been a good idea had I actually remembered the gate was even there. So there I was, hanging on the gate and crying out like I was dying. I eventually fell off, I'm sure looking something similar to a raw egg sliding off the edge of a counter top mixed with the grace of a misshapen rubber, dog toy bouncing around on the floor. Ryan came running to see if I was okay. He kept asking if I was bleeding, to let him see where I'd hit, and to get me to stand up. Between short raspy breaths I begged him to let me just stay on the floor. And so he did what any amazing husband would do. He warmed up that bottle and ran it in to Lane. (On his side, I did ask him to see about Lane.) After ten minutes he helped me off the floor, got me an ice pack, and walked me back to the bed.
And then we listened to Lane fuss for another hour.
As we were in bed, listening to the future craigslist item fuss, and I was straddling two ice packs, Ryan started giggling. He then got really quiet and said, "I bet you don't forget again."
I agreed.
Then he said, "Well, at least we know it's a sturdy gate."
"Yup."
After an hour of listening to Lane fuss, we finally got back up, fixed a bottle (formula, this time) and I got on the couch. I ended up feeding Lane his bottle with both of us on the couch laying down. And of course, he wouldn't sleep with me on the outside. Oh no....he would only get comfortable on the outside. I thought I could just force the issue, but he decided to squirm and KICK me in the hoo-hoo region (where a baby gate had recently left its own mark) so I gave up and put him on the outside. Because I was so scared that I would drift to sleep and he'd roll off the couch...you guessed it....I pretty much just stayed awake the entire time. The joys of parenthood.
At 5:30 I heard my alarm go off and decided to put Lane in his crib. I usually get up at 5:30, shower, dress, and head to the kitchen to gather lunches and bottles. Not this morning. This morning, I said, "To heck with that," and got back in the bed.
I finally got up at 6:15 and started my shower. If I wasn't awake enough, I quickly awoke to our new shower head. Really, the shower head isn't new. For some reason unknown to us, we woke up yesterday with water pressure approximately twice the level it was previously. Normally, I love a shower head that gives a good beating. However, this is close to taking skin off. I'm thinking it might be the City's new idea for going green...you certainly take shorter showers because it empties the hot water A LOT faster. On the upside, until we get it figured out, we'll be offering skin ex-foliation services for an excellent rate.
On the way in to work, Ryan leans over and lovingly asks, "How's your crotch?"
I respond, "It hurts," and leave it at that.
Work was work...except for the fact that I waddled everywhere if I sat too long. I got invited to go check on some things (I work in the Facilities Department, so there's a lot of 'checking on things'), but had to decline. They'd ask, "You okay?" and I'd respond with, "Yeah...just tripped on the baby gate...kinda sore." Honestly, how do I explain that I'm sporting a bruise that would make Rocky look like a sissy and I got it from doing flips on a three-foot-tall baby gate that, believe it or not, is quite, freakin' sturdy...?
Oh...and the big kicker? Tonight was supposed to be Date Night. We were going to drop Lane off (read: ditch) at a grandparent's house and head out for a nice meal and sit there for hours just to talk...with just us. (Yes, we know we're boring...but...we actually like each other so...it works. Yay!) After work, we decided that we didn't want to sit in a restaurant with me being miserable because I was hurting so bad. So...we just stayed home, had a simple supper, and watched Lane play all over the floor while we watched a movie. It's now 9:00 and we're so excited to go to bed, it's nowhere NEAR funny.
Even though it kinda is.
Let's see, where should we start? Ryan bought us a new baby gate. The one we had was the wooden kind that holds itself with tension. We got the new one during the week, but lacked time to install it. It's the one that is metal and screws into the wall. Remember that...ATTACHES to the wall. We decided to put it between the living room and eating area. After Ryan installed it, we were a little concerned that it would stay in place if Lane pulled himself up on it. Sigh...yeah...
Lane has been a bit of a turd lately and has started a new habit of waking up at 3:00 am. This morning was no exception. At 3:16 this morning I finally got up to get him a bottle of water. I got up, walked to the kitchen (you SO know where I'm going with this, right?) and...let's just say the only thing I remember is thinking, "What the...? Why am I parallel to the floor...but not hitting it...but certainly not standing up? And why does my mid section feel like someone took a crow bar to it?" Yeah...we'd left the swinging gate open so we could get through it easier in the middle of the night. Would have been a good idea had I actually remembered the gate was even there. So there I was, hanging on the gate and crying out like I was dying. I eventually fell off, I'm sure looking something similar to a raw egg sliding off the edge of a counter top mixed with the grace of a misshapen rubber, dog toy bouncing around on the floor. Ryan came running to see if I was okay. He kept asking if I was bleeding, to let him see where I'd hit, and to get me to stand up. Between short raspy breaths I begged him to let me just stay on the floor. And so he did what any amazing husband would do. He warmed up that bottle and ran it in to Lane. (On his side, I did ask him to see about Lane.) After ten minutes he helped me off the floor, got me an ice pack, and walked me back to the bed.
And then we listened to Lane fuss for another hour.
As we were in bed, listening to the future craigslist item fuss, and I was straddling two ice packs, Ryan started giggling. He then got really quiet and said, "I bet you don't forget again."
I agreed.
Then he said, "Well, at least we know it's a sturdy gate."
"Yup."
After an hour of listening to Lane fuss, we finally got back up, fixed a bottle (formula, this time) and I got on the couch. I ended up feeding Lane his bottle with both of us on the couch laying down. And of course, he wouldn't sleep with me on the outside. Oh no....he would only get comfortable on the outside. I thought I could just force the issue, but he decided to squirm and KICK me in the hoo-hoo region (where a baby gate had recently left its own mark) so I gave up and put him on the outside. Because I was so scared that I would drift to sleep and he'd roll off the couch...you guessed it....I pretty much just stayed awake the entire time. The joys of parenthood.
At 5:30 I heard my alarm go off and decided to put Lane in his crib. I usually get up at 5:30, shower, dress, and head to the kitchen to gather lunches and bottles. Not this morning. This morning, I said, "To heck with that," and got back in the bed.
I finally got up at 6:15 and started my shower. If I wasn't awake enough, I quickly awoke to our new shower head. Really, the shower head isn't new. For some reason unknown to us, we woke up yesterday with water pressure approximately twice the level it was previously. Normally, I love a shower head that gives a good beating. However, this is close to taking skin off. I'm thinking it might be the City's new idea for going green...you certainly take shorter showers because it empties the hot water A LOT faster. On the upside, until we get it figured out, we'll be offering skin ex-foliation services for an excellent rate.
On the way in to work, Ryan leans over and lovingly asks, "How's your crotch?"
I respond, "It hurts," and leave it at that.
Work was work...except for the fact that I waddled everywhere if I sat too long. I got invited to go check on some things (I work in the Facilities Department, so there's a lot of 'checking on things'), but had to decline. They'd ask, "You okay?" and I'd respond with, "Yeah...just tripped on the baby gate...kinda sore." Honestly, how do I explain that I'm sporting a bruise that would make Rocky look like a sissy and I got it from doing flips on a three-foot-tall baby gate that, believe it or not, is quite, freakin' sturdy...?
Oh...and the big kicker? Tonight was supposed to be Date Night. We were going to drop Lane off (read: ditch) at a grandparent's house and head out for a nice meal and sit there for hours just to talk...with just us. (Yes, we know we're boring...but...we actually like each other so...it works. Yay!) After work, we decided that we didn't want to sit in a restaurant with me being miserable because I was hurting so bad. So...we just stayed home, had a simple supper, and watched Lane play all over the floor while we watched a movie. It's now 9:00 and we're so excited to go to bed, it's nowhere NEAR funny.
Even though it kinda is.
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